Do You Have Cool Kids Syndrome?

What inspires you? Are you the kind of entrepreneur who knows herself (or himself)? Are you SOLID in what you offer? Do you know what you bring to the table that is a different offering from anyone else?

You are unique and what you have to offer is completely unique. Do you see that in yourself? Are you inspired by ideas and practices that fit into what it is that you are creating or are you swayed by every wind that comes by…are you led by the nose by the “cool kids”?

I don’t know if it’s changed much, but when I was in school there were all these groups of kids, “the artist, creatives”, “the loners”, “the geeks” and “the cool kids”, these were the stars in EVERYTHING. Everything they did was surrounded by excitement, was there anything they couldn’t accomplish?  I remember watching them walk through the halls with that incredible magnetism and wondering “how do I get just a little bit of that sauce?” I wanted so bad to be seen because I felt completely invisible, so unworthy of even existing at times. I made up a name for that feeling …” cool kid syndrome”, wanting to follow the next cool kid and be just like them.

Fortunately, as I grew in spirituality and maturity I began to learn that I had my own sauce and things to give out that I could be proud of and excited about. It made me feel whole and useful and complete. I still struggle occasionally with feeling worthy but one thing I know for sure now is I don’t need to chase someone else’s dream or long for their “coolness”. It’s liberating!

As an entrepreneur, you are your brand. Knowing who you are, what you offer, what you bring to the table, who you want to work with, how you want to work with them, becomes REALLY easy and clear when you know who you are. Otherwise, every person who has a story of, or appearance of success becomes your “cool kid” and you get EXCITED, and in AWE and say…” that’s what I’m going to start doing”, “they are doing it right”, “I want to be just like them”.  Sadly you and your brand get totally lost and become a regurgitation and poor replica of a million different cool kids who themselves are probably a replica. This is why authenticity can be oh so elusive…but that’s a topic for another post. So, how do you know if you have “cool kid syndrome”? You may have it if:

  • You have 100 different mentors in a 100 different industries with a 100 different philosophies on business
  • You have a different business coach every few months
  • You follow one coach, mentor or course just until you are asked to actually do something and then you move on to the next cool kid
  • Your business focus changes every time you take a seminar or watch someone you admire go live
  • Your business focus changes every time you talk to someone who is excited about a product or service you don’t offer
  • You’ve been in business for years, have made some income, you know you have something special but you still really have no idea what it is that you do and neither does anyone else
  • Your business partnerships change monthly
  • You spend more time watching, “learning”, admiring, absorbing, researching, investigating than you do actually working and building your own brand

How do you know that you probably don’t have “cool kid syndrome” but you just love to learn and admire others…

  • Getting excited for someone else doesn’t change what you are building in your business
  • You know when to be in learning mode and when to be in action mode
  • You have 1 or 2 coaches at a time, not 10….
  • You have business partners that you collaborate with, communicate with and support. You are not a groupie, you are a solid partner. They can count on you for bringing YOUR sauce to the table every time
  • You can see an announcement about a new tool or process without spending hours researching it and figuring out how to bring it into your business
  • You can attend an event and celebrate the success of others without becoming confused and paralyzed in your own business
  • You stand solidly in your brand, you know who you are, what you offer and even as you grow…. your story, your purpose and the core of your business remains the same. Unshakable, focused, clear.
  • Renee A. Hughes